Whisky Writes

i think i ve rather disgraced myselfWhisky Portrait
a few mornings ago
i was patrolling the garden
looking for frogs
when i saw a strange man
walking past the house
he was bald and wearing sandals
and an orange wrap around dress
well that wasn t usual
so i barked at him to scare him away

how was i supposed to know
that s what a monk looks like

***

as you all know
i m a bit of a gay icon
thanks to my incredibly good looks
i even have my own gay stalker
he still comes around
from time to time
to gaze longingly
at my fine masculine physique

i appreciate the loyalty of my fans
i was therefore disturbed
to learn recently that
a dog is going to be executed
for being gay

actually
the newspaper didn t use the word
executed

it said put down

put down
murdered
assassinated
put to death
bumped off
dispatched
slain
executed

they all have the same end result

it seemed particularly unfair
because they don t put down humans
for loving somebody with
the same shaped naughty bits

oh

master tells me that
in countries such as sudan
mauritania nigeria somaliland
saudi arabia united arab emirates
yemen and iran
they do kill you for that

and in lots of other countries
they send you to a crate for
a very very long time

that s not so good

***

when you spend as many
hours a day asleep as i do
you can become bored
with your sleeping positions
so it s important to try new ones
here s one that i ve been
working on lately

Whisky sleeping

however i rather think
i could take lessons from this chap

I think my dog is broken

he s a real expert

whisky

 

Sleeping Doberman photo shamelessly stolen from from Reddit which has a lot of very funny comments (and a few rather rude ones).

[641]

Advertisements

No comments yet

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: